beautiful butterfly

it was a lie when OUR BIG things broken.
and it was you who emotionally decided without consider any chance.
"a-second-chance" and straightly said that i have NO RIGHT to questioning this relationship >.< maybe...
.....you are not really that into me...
*thank you putri for brought-out this thought to me*

in anyway,,,
this issue was already be a -heartjunk- women heart-to-heart thing for some of mi bestie.
and for me it is more like a scar.
it was a small wound that i thought i could handle at first but it is unheal wound.

the-losing-feeling is proliferate...
filled my heart with all this melanolic - lovestory - misery.
the fluctuation of emotion made me feel this intermiten pingpong sentation feeling.
always fake a smile like nothing happen. like nothing is "going on" down there.

one of them asked me..
dont you feel tired with all of this feeling?
dissapointment combined with this "out of reach" hope??
have you ever once in moment have a thought to over this shit?

Dear the fairy of my glommy lovelife.
please dont tell me how to feel. cause im just stepping GOD destiny in anyway.
and when this "up and down" feeling still rolling on and on...
maybe this is just like a phase that i should step..
before i become butterfly,,
a- beautiful- butterfly :)